Hello new girl? How are you doing?

I heard about you yesterday and I must admit I am still shocked. I know it has been a year since him and me broke up but somehow I had a feeling he didn’t forget me yet.

Anyway, I heard some cool things about you. I heard you are workaholic, popular and easy going. Everything that I am not. Maybe that’s why it hurts me so much. I hurts me he did something I told him he will never do. He found a better one. And I don’t have problem to admit that. Maybe you see me as you opponent but please don’t, because it is not true.

I just wanted to say some things that are on my heart.

So let’s start:

I hope he will make you laugh because that is what people in love do. Unfortunately I have been crying more than laughing in our relationship. That’s why he is my ex now. If there is more tears than smile then what is the point of being in a relationship like that? At least I was capable to end it, even if he meant the world to me. So I just hope he will treat you better than me. I honestly, honestly hope so!

I hope he will support you and that you will feel special when being around him. He never supported my decisions and he always acted like my opinion is not worth enough. Even when I graduated he wasn’t there to kiss me and tell me how proud he was. You probably think how I could date someone cold blooded like that? Well, my dear, what can I tell you, love is blind.

I hope he will be there when you need him because he wasn’t around in my worst moments. Sometimes I asked myself: “What the heck am I doing with him?” But there was that feeling of weakness when he wasn’t there. It felt like I am addicted to him, he was like my drug that is pushing me to ruin myself but at the same time it felt so good. I really hope he will be better to you than he was to me….I really do!

I hope he will love you because what he felt for me wasn’t real love. We were more like friends with benefits and he would come only if he needed something. And honestly speaking, that sucks! Real partners should support each other and not take advantage of each other.

I hope he treats you like a queen because he treated me like a shit. I was there when he was down, to comfort him and tell him that everything will be okay. And what did I get in return? Nothing! It feels so bad when you experience a situation like this so I really hope you will be luckier than I was.

I wanted to be honest with you so I told you all of this. And the truth is I still didn’t get over him. I still feel something for him. I am not sure whether that is love but it is definitely there. I was broken when he left me. At first it was feeling of some shock, followed by denial and then some combination of loneliness and anger. I must admit it wasn’t easy for me to go through all that hell alone but somehow I made it through. People say God gives you only what you can endure. So in the end I was a survivor, not letting myself to go down over a shitty ex-boyfriend. And you know what? That was the best decision of my life.

In the end I just want to say that I hope he won’t broke your heart and if the worst scenario happens, don’t forget you are not alone. I felt the need as a woman to warn you since I felt that was what I needed. I am not saying he is the same man now nor that you are other version of me. I am just here to give you heads up. Be smart and take care of yourself.

I wish you guys all the best!

Ex girlfriend!

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